I'm so surprised that alcoholism destroys the partner as well, it almost doesn't make sense - when you're the one not doing the drinking. It's all b/c of how they act.

Is that typical behavior what I've described... Blaming you for everything (and I do mean everything. The worst was, the other night. It was garbage night, and I had taken out the kitchen trash and put them in the outside cans. I hadn't yet put a new bag in the kitchen trash can. He started flying off the handle. F word was flying, "How f hard is it to f put in a new f bag?" Then started calling me lazy and all this other stuff. I said, I can't believe you're throwing a fit about this. I just took the trash out 10 minutes ago and forgot to put a new bag in. It's not a big deal. He said "F You - Just go sit down and be lazy" - and then he proceeded to put a bag in my trash can.

I was astounded, and knew right then... I don't want this. He's emotionally abusive. I was upset the rest of the night, and wouldn't talk to him, but to be honest - he wouldn't talk to me either, if he did - it was nastiness. I made him sleep on the couch. Now, he's royally mad at me... b/c I did that, and I feel bad now. Like, yeah I guess it was your fault - you made him sleep on the couch - that isn't fair. That's what I say to myself. But he really hurt my feelings, and reacted in a way that was insane. I was blown away. Unfortunately HIS son was there. Thank God, mine not... and, his son even said "Dad, it's just a garbage bag, and he walked away crying".... His son is only 8. His boy loves me, you can tell that. I feel for his son, I don't know what that must be like.

My question... especially to you Platinum Heart - since you were there once, and by the way Congrat's on the victory of being sober! GOOD GOOD for you! Keep up the awesome work. Did you have the jeckyll & hyde personality? If you did, were you aware of it then, or the next day when you were sober? Or did you truly believe, it was everyone elses fault - and never your own?

I'm trying to get into his mind a little... get an idea of what he thinks/knows. Does he KNOW he acts like this? And it's just all a play... Or does he truly believe it's me?