Recent threads of mine have been about the fact that friends do not initiate contact with me and tend to flake out on me.

Well, I have only one friend (G) who invites with some regularity. She also tells me that we're very alike in how our friendships with others tend to work. Here's where I'm a jerk: I can understand why people may not want to hang around G, and it bothers me because I've always been afraid that this is why people don't want to be around me, like in hanging with her I'm seeing a reflection of myself. Trouble is, I don't really know how to fix those things about myself because it's not like she's mean or hurtful; it's just...her. See, G is super smart, to the point that she can be a little obnoxious. You can kind of tell that she likes to hear herself talk, and she talks a lot. At my grad party, some of my family mentioned it to me and I was just like, "Well...that's G." I mean, deal with it. They've dealt with my motormouth for how many years? And I've actually gotten a lot better (though, I know, I type a lot on here. Believe me, I've toned it down immensely offline). I did tactfully talk to her about it after the fact and this is what is awesome about her: she was humble about it and apologetic, not defensive. So I'm cool with it.

But the reasons I like G sort of blend into the reasons why people may not want to hang out with her: She is super smart. I can have a conversation with her and there's never a lag in the conversation. We have similar interests. And beyond that she's fun, nerdy, and unpretentious. So beyond the fact that sometimes she can be a bit of a PITA, she's very genuine and nice. I guess...overall I don't get why people would flake on her all her life.

I think I've toned down my know-it-all behavior quite a lot offline, as well as my chattiness (I didn't realize I was doing these things until about 5 years ago--chalk it up to being an only child, maybe?) Social anxiety makes it so I just don't want to chat with people as much, too. I do have a few people I'm incredibly comfortable with, and with whom the conversation will flow pretty naturally. And yeah, I'll get going with them. But they're usually talkers, too. I guess I'm wondering, and I sort of feel weird asking this as well, does someone who is more bookish and intelligent, interested in geeky things, and etc tend to be on the outside of most social circles just by default? I do work in an industry where extroverts rule, and in a specialty in that industry where extroverts really thrive.

Maybe a silly post. But it's been floating around my mind a bit. I know, I'm completely socially challenged; it's a thing. I can't help it.

Thanks for your input.