Well thanks thats so nice of you to write <font color="red"> </font> that. I have fought with him though, screamed and hung up the phone. He's a crazy maker, but I wanted to figure out how I can stay neutral now realizing that he is indeed bipolar. You see I was HOPING he wasn't, I was hoping I was mistaken. I was even hoping it was something else.

I just read a new article on bipolarism that stated from new research bipolarism shrinks the brain and is progressive. Thats distressing and nothing I would want to find out. Have you heard of this? A disease once hardly recognized and many people thought a myth, is now being taken very seriously.

I have met people online as well who very casually state that they have been diagnosed as "bipolar" by their doctor, but they don't seem concerned with it, and they even tell me, they don't believe the diagnosis. At the time I never really said much about it, as I didn't know anything about it.

Now its all becoming abundantly clear something is going on and I don't like it at all, but at least I know WHAT IT IS. You see, I just didn't really know if he was bipolar, and now, sadly, I know.

So on to the next level, but in the meantime, how do I deal with him until I can help him go get help. I did tell him I would accompany him.

I will also check out your suggestions about the caregivers forum. Thanks!

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meander said:
Well you can certainly support him, and I'm sure he'd be glad of such support, but the truth is, he must be willing to realise that he has a problem and want to fix it.

If it is bipolar, then he should definitely try to get some help. If you can encourage him to talk to a doctor or counsellor or therapist, that's the first step. If he doesn't want help, you don't have to run away, but be aware the situation will most likely get worse and may in turn cause problems and bad feelings for you, which you don't need.

I think one of the most important things, whatever you choose, is to realise at the end of the day that this is his problem, not yours, and while you can certainly help, you can't fix it without him wanting it to be fixed. You should make sure your world doesn't become entirely focused on him, be supportive, but set boundaries so you're not dragged down also.

You may also want to consider posting in the Caregivers forum... some of the people there will have practical experience in this matter.

Good luck, and whatever happens, you are an amazing person for caring this much.

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