Weekends are the worst. I'm always alone... no friends, no T, thinking about T 24/7... knowing she fills her weekends with family and friends, so much love... and I'm here. Just me. She feels light years away and while I love her I hate her for having a fulfilling life outside of the office... She's so good to me, but I hate when she's happy (it sounds horrible but I know it's based on neediness)... Her happiness extends beyond office hours and mine doesn't, and I'm mad at her for that... how dare she switch gears and forget about me during the weekend? I'm horrible. Without even knowing them, I hate her family and friends for having access to her 24/7, and being in her warm comfort all the time... laughing, making memories. I think and overthink... and fantasize about the fun she has with those she is intimate with. Which doesn't include me. God I'm a mess.