thank you for your reply bellaviolet.

I'm not sure about the idea that you say I must be strong...... I just learned from a toddler that "mandy" doesn't matter and what happens to her is like what happens to a chair or a curtain...... I denied-- feelings. chairs and curtains don't feel-- but what I wasn't prepared for was that those feelings can only be denied for so long.... (in my case anyway-- which was a VERY long time too).... and then they began to seep out, and not having dealt much with feelings-- I'm not so sure what to do about them.... it's confusing, in the sense that it's like-- I'm NOT myself anymore.... which is also a bit sccary.

well... went on a bit there.... sorry....

thank you for replying-- I appreciate it.

bellavoilet-