I am a long-time CPTSD sufferer. I don't smile a lot and that must turn people off. Lately, I don't seem to enjoy anything and have completely lost interest in life. I've gained weight from all the sitting around and doing nothing. I can't bring myself to mix with others and that includes joining a gym. Exercising is supposed to be good for the mind but, with me, I just seem to get uptight when in public and there is no joy and forcing myself to go is misery.

I know that I am a misfit. T's try and try and try to get me to go out and meet new people but, when I do, it never goes well. I've even stopped volunteering - people just don't like me. Even if I try to perk up, it makes no difference. People don't want me around. T's don't even want me as a patient anymore. I make no progress. It's more than my state of mind; I just don't have the interpersonal skills. Never did. People are routinely mean to drive me away. I can't seem to hold a job much less get hired. I work hard but have little personality. I could not even get my parents to like me. My CPTSD is very bad and I am constantly yelling at myself. I hate my life but don't seem to be able to improve it at all. I seem to be cursed because everything just goes wrong. I go to therapy and am told to be positive! That makes no difference. Changing my thoughts does not improve the quality of my life. All Ts do is build me up only to have me fail again and again. Then they say, get up and try again! I do think that I need therapy but I need much more than thinking positively to succeed. I need skills that I don't seem to understand well or to execute. Meantime, all I do is isolate and get more and more depressed.