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Nov 09, 2015, 05:56 PM
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Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 18,076
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This has been a tough thread for me to read. Lots of old "stuff" came boiling to the surface.
from BlueCrustacean
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But sex IS important in a relationship. If you're not having it, then that must indicate that love is not there anymore.
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This is just not true. What about couples who for physical reasons can no longer have sex. Does that mean they no longer love one another? No, it means the physical act is no longer possible.
From what Werewoman posted, she still loves her husband. She wants to want him. They still have sex, she doesn't getting "the feeling" and initiate sex.
Werewoman, is your husband open to discussing the fact that you still love him, still desire him, but don't have initiate things. You say that you and your therapist are working through what happened in your past. Personally, while I struggled through the old shyte I didn't want anyone touching me in a sexual way. What would your husband say if you had an accident that caused a physical injury that took your libido away? Would he work with you to work around it? This is the same sort of thing, except the injury is to your mental health, not physical body.
I'm also wondering if his pressuring you to initiate sex is creating something like performance anxiety for you? In my case, if someone pressured me to do something I was already struggling with my anxiety would go through the roof.
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