Hey.
I have been a very emotional and sensitive girl all my life. When I was little if anyone ever even yelled at me I would go on crying for hours. I would always be insecure or feel left out and cry all the time. I would cry on the stupidest things. And be affected on everything.
I have been like this till a month ago. I am 19 now btw.
In 2013 when my grandpa passed away I was a mess. I cried the most in my entire family. I broke down in school so many times. I was a mess for months.
A month ago my grandma passed away and I was emotionless. Like ya I miss her and stuff but I haven't cried even once. And I was closer to her than my grandpa.
I seriously feel emotionless. I don't know why I am being like this. Am I heartless now?
And recently my brother got engaged and ya I'm happy but I'm not as excited as I have always been about his wedding. I used to tell people I'll tear up whenever it happens. Now I'm just okay with it.
I know some people will say its growing up. But I have seen so many grown ups cry when someone passes away. I didn't even cry when my grandma who I have lived with for 8 years passed away.
What's wrong with me?
I don't like this change.
I miss the old me who cared about everything and everyone.
I feel like I have a cold heart.
As well as I have been distracted from college for the past 6 months. I seriously can not concentrate. It's so weird. My life seems like its going no where.ugh