CHRIST i've done my most embarrassing thing in months today. someone like. started to whistle in another room and i just shrieked. like a help-i've-been-stabbed shriek. a ****-my-pants-jumpscare-in-a-horror-game shriek. a four-year-old's-first-day-at-preschool shriek. completely beyond my control. it was out before i could stop it. they timed it perfectly between my songs, i knew they'd start listening for cues to do it and here it is. i can't allow any moments of silence anymore. it's just getting worse.