"I'm torn between a side of myself that find the spiritual, the metaphysical, the unexplained, the irrational utterly fascinating and beautiful...and the careful thinker who's been basically taught (socially) that all of those things are nonsense for stupid, weak-minded, illogical people who don't properly understand science and need delusional superstitions to make sense of reality."........

People who say these kind of things are the Stupid weak minded ones. Those who judge will remain Ignorant.

Keep an open mind and explore. Try to Understand instead of Judge. Most important, do not judge yourself. Then you will do well on your spiritual journey. Spirituality is really about connections. You can PM me if you like.

Understanding means knowledge, and knowledge = power.