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Originally Posted by Ellahmae
It is hard, but pushing through the hard (as cliche and annoying as it sounds) helps us gain insights and growth. I hope you can work through it no matter what you choose.  |
I know you're right. Instinct is to hide and avoid but one thing I've learned in therapy is that hiding does not work. You may squelch the pain temporarily or numb it but it's there ready to show up when least expected
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Originally Posted by velcro003
I am chiming in with going and letting her know you were hurt by her non-response on Sunday. Maybe she was super busy? Or had a sick friend or family member, or saw the text while she was doing something else and then forgot to reply later? I am guilty of that last one!
There are a ton of reasons why she didn't answer, and you will only spin out until you talk to her about it-and waiting another week will probably only heighten your anxiety.
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I guess I believe my T is capable of a short acknowledgment of my suffering. I didn't expect to receive 'therapy' through text - just a "it hurts, I know. we'll talk soon."
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Originally Posted by wotchermuggle
Do you think continuing to text (and possibly cryptic ones at that) is the best choice? I'm only asking, not judging.
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The texting 'protocol' that T and I have is simple. She allows (even encourages) me to vent my emotions with text. We've found that when I share emotions that are 'alive' at the moment, she knows better what's going on with me. If I try to relate the emotion days later, it may have already descended into forgetfulness.
The protocol also includes her not needing to reply unless I specifically request it. That agreement is helpful to me because then I feel more free to vent.
That being said, many times she DOES reply with a few words of encouragement. Given that Sunday's emotions were off the chart, I'm beyond hurt that she didn't even acknowledge me.
I don't text her that often - just when emotions are hot. Months can go by without me contacting her that way.
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Originally Posted by Pennster
Do you think it's possible that she didn't see the message, or saw it and there was some technical glitch in replying or something? That has happened a few times with my therapist. If I don't hear back from him within a reasonable amount of time I usually contact him again and then he usually tells me that his phone was problematic or the return message hadn't sent properly or something. It's always worked out to be a technical problem or an oversight.
But I know how painful it can be not to hear back- I really hope you will go to the session and find out why she didn't reply.
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I sent her multiple messages. Like I stated above, when my emotions are on fire, she's o.k. with me venting with text. I don't expect therapy from her via text but sometimes when it's a very tough situation, she WILL reply. That's why it's so painful that I got nothing from her Sunday or Monday
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Originally Posted by atisketatasket
It's not clear to me that you're positive that she got the text and positive that she deliberately didn't deliberately reply. I've had texts sent to me and texts I sent go astray.
Unless I missed it, you've said nothing that indicates she even knows why you're mad at her. And the fact that she's still texting you suggests maybe something just went wrong this weekend. I'd want to find out if I were you.
Sorry that this is so upsetting. I hope things resolve themselves.
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You're right - I can't be absolutely positive she knows why I'm upset. But she's a very smart person who has known me for 5 years. I would be shocked if she didn't have a clue.