Wow. Now I remember why I have this forum blocked. I don't know if you are still here but... IMO your problem is only indirectly related to kissing. As someone said, unless your kisses draw blood you're probably not doing it that badly. And yes, be careful with the tongue. I was in a club one night and a stranger walked up and kissed me. She put her tongue so far in my mouth I felt like I was being attacked by the creature in Alien Kissing should never feel like an assault. An infiltration maybe but not like unleashing a full frontal attack. Go slow. Let it happen. Explore. Don't forget your hands. Touch her face... her neck... slide your fingers through her hair. Be careful with your teeth... she isn't a hamburger. And relax