Thank you Linus, I did take off this weekend and went out of town with my husband. But all I heard when I came back was how difficult shopping was without me which left me feeling even guiltier for leaving. I feel so trapped. Also today is Veteran's Day which sucks because it reminds me of my time in the army when I was raped by a superior. No charges were ever filed because it basically was labelled as acquaintance rape before that term existed. I am reminded once again on this day, that though I served; all I have to show for it is a messed up psyche and a lot of residual anger and heartbreak. I feel so lost today. my chest hurts and it's hard to breathe. Thanks for listening to my pathetic saga.