I don't know where to go with this...I am actually quite embarrassed to talk about it.

So for some time my "boyfriend" and I have been having some major issues. Mostly I am sick of him lying to me. I am fighting back and he does not like it. What started this was that he lies about paying bills, we bought a house together and he has not really paid anything in any way...This goes back 12 years so I am trying to keep it brief. Because of his actions I gave up having a life...food on the table and roof over the head for our kids...or go out all the time.

He also lies about whenever this girl is around and when they go out. He has lied about her being friends with our neighbor and really is head goes completely up his *** when she is around.

Well all of a sudden he started going to work all the time and working doubles on the weekends. This does not come from a person who is a habitual no call no show. I think that he is with that girl instead. Supposedly she does not work overtime, but when his car breaks down, there she is to pick him up. I saw them kiss too and he had her arm around her. He then got out of the car and was looking right at me. Also supposedly she is his best friend, but I did not meet her for two years until I came home early from work one day and there she was parked in my parking spot...It was obvious that he did not want us to meet...Oh yeah he also washed her car and drove it around for awhile. But what was really disturbing was that he did not wake up for work one night. He blamed me (I actually was up, but was having a massive allergy attack and really was not paying attention to the time) He usually yells at me anyway when I wake him up so I have to send my daughter to do it, but she happenend to fall asleep. He kept on yelling at me so I told him to go f**k his 24 year old girlfriend. He called me a fat sausage and we have not spoken in two weeks.
We have been going through periods of time like this...no Hi, No bye, No nothing....Honestly I think I really hate him. Too much time has passed and nothing is being resolved. He shows up 4-6 hours after a shift ends and tells me he's been working,,,for what I wonder...he never has any money, he never pays for repairs or broken things. I can't ask him anything because he tells me to do it myself...When my intention was us fixing something together.

He always has some sort of comeback...like fine you want me to pay for my part of the car insurance...I won't pay the babysitter then....WTF.

And I am like ummm, I helped you to pay all your debt, you took tens of thousands of dollars out of the house and kept it for yourself...You left me when I was out on maternity leave, working 12 hours a day and making no money...he said he had to pay to go to work and couldn't help pay any of the bills. I know this goes back, but the same things keep happening and he messes with me too. Like I was going to get you a dog for your birthday (he let my dog out with no leash on a busy street and he got run over by a car)

Mostly he tells me that no one likes me everyone hates me and all I care about is money while he cares about people.

I started checking his phone records because I really do think he is trying to be with some girl...He has a thing for 24 year olds...He is in his mid 40's.
I am kinda obsessed with it. I think I am just looking for that final confirmation.

I really need help with this. I am absolutely miserable.
I am just angry all the time. I wake up mad. I drive to work mad. I drive home mad. I can't even look at him.

Sorry for being so long... I am just so pissed!!