I have been in counseling on n off for many years - the answers they give me: "you will always hurt over that, nothing you can do - move on" or "that was a ling time ago - get over it"

Wounds like that are like open wounds that just fester waiting for the next thing to hit it...and remind you its still there.

I just don't understand it - I can remember how it felt to be loved by him, to feel his arms around me hugging me n know he would be there for me. I can remember playing as a kid with him n helping him do things - I can remember his laugh n smile. I remember the security when I heard him say "I love you." Yet, now - that's all gone - I don't get any of it, n I have no idea why ... it hurts, hurts bad