Well, for weeks and days I have not looked forward to Remembrance Day. I am a Veteran so getting out for the services and remembrance celebrations was of the utmost importance. I had been putting myself through a lot of negative self talk, a lot of brutal catasrophizing, a lot of black and white thinking, and general worry. Namely, being surrounded by thousands of people and what would everyone think of me. Also what would I say when and if I ran into former friends and fellow Service members.

Well I did it. My sense of loyalty wond out over over the anxiety and I forced myself to go. There were over 10,000 people at the indoor arena for the service and hundreds at the Legion I ended up at afterwards - standing room only. Too be in such a crowd would normally have been excrutiating and caused a panic attack.

But the friend I was with stood by the entire time and was very supportive recognizing when I had my moments and 'screened' those people who approached me. In the end it was a success. Exhausting, but I made it through the day and even managed to enjoy myself at times