Inny,

I would absolutely sit down and have a talk with the in-laws. You do not have to give them the gory details but just give them high level information. That you were abused and that your "family" uses manipulation to coerce you and others around you. You could give the example of what happened with the last family.

You don't need to tell them you SI and if you give them a general history of what your step father is like they probably wouldn't believe him anyway.

Your step father knows that you will back down because you have in the past that's why he's being a bully. You need to stand up once and for all and just let him know that you aren't going to take it.

Calls in and of themselves may not technically be harrassment, however, you can file a restraining order and then he would be arrested for calling you or coming near you.

Please, please do not let this man control your life or ruin anymore relationships - you deserve so much better!

Tranq