Hi. I've been in treatment/meds since about age 13. I've had many dxs deoression, anxiety, ptsd, bipolar, psychotic features. I have been on mist meds except maois and stimulants. Even things like throrazine Last year it was found in neurological testing I have temporal lobe epilepsy and myoclonus so what tge shrinks assumed was psychosis was migraine auras and seizure activity.

Anyway, I still have issues with periodic horrific depression. When I was a teen and given Prozac back in the day, I was given a high dose, my mom said I was acting "manic" Hence a BP dx that followed me for years. Others I've tried didn't make a dent in my depression or gave me bad side effects, like Celexa making myoconics worse, welbutrin giving me a seizures. Geodon gave me the same kind of seizures but more severe. Other antipsychotics gave me akathesia, diarhhea, rediculous weightgain, I slept all day and was totally slowed down and even more depressed than when I started treatment.

So my seizures are under control (hopefully) with meds that are used as mood stabilizers but I'm having dark thoughts, I cry, I'm lazy, just full of misery. I'm straight up depressed. I eat right, take vitamins, try to walk, go to yoga once a week, go to day treatment, do all the skill stuff but I feel like something bad is gonna happen if I don't get the proper medication . I don't know. I feel like nothing can help me I'm really on the edge.