Judgment is common because it's the easy way out. It's easier to judge others than to really hear or see them. Judgments allow us to frame our perceptions of others within our own narrative in creative ways. Really getting the other person is a more complex process. I certainly perceive others as attractive, and likewise appreciate when they perceive me in the same way, but it's far more based on what I get from them spiritually, and a thousand percent more meaningful when it's not overtly clouded by appearances.

I feel like being obsessive about appearance, worrying "do I look pretty" tends to become apparent in one's presentation, and can send a message to others that a person can be swayed and manipulated, being focused on surface reality in that way. I happen to have extremely vain parents, so I was brought up to think the same way; it was many years of work undoing that conditioning once I realized how troublesome it can be. How distractive.

I guess what I really didn't like about the article is how it's actually telling women "we all obsess about being pretty, it's how we are", which is messaging we already get plenty of through capitalistic intervention by way of fashion magazines and glorified objectification of celebrities with no other apparent talent but that of marketing their physical appearance. It's shortsighted and destructive messaging, in my opinion.