Quote:
Originally Posted by PinkFlamingo99
I know it's ridiculous and they're just trying to keep me safe, but I'm having serious trust issues with her and the pdoc now. It makes it hard to be honest and I even have a horrible knot in my stomach right now. I know it's stupid, but it's hard to get over it being a punishment and not wanting to be "caught" being unwell.
I know I need to force myself anyway, but it's hard not to feel a little betrayed/hurt/alone right now. Even though logically I know they need to put my safety first.
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It's not ridiculous--I totally get it. I had similar fears when my p-doc/T/MC were talking about having me do an intensive outpatient program, where I wouldn't be able to see any of them for like 6 weeks. Talk about those fears with them. I did, and it helped me understand more and feel safer and more secure with them. That it was because they cared, not that they were frustrated or annoyed with me. That it wasn't "punishment," just them thinking maybe I needed a higher level of care than they could give right then. But if I hadn't talked about it with them, then I still would have had those fears, I'm sure. I'm still pretty jumpy around my p-doc, who I've known much less time than the other two.
As others have said, they're doing the opposite of abandoning you like your ex-T did--they're trying to help but are only able to do so much themselves. They want to see you get better and not be in so much pain.