Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight
It's not ridiculous--I totally get it. I had similar fears when my p-doc/T/MC were talking about having me do an intensive outpatient program, where I wouldn't be able to see any of them for like 6 weeks. Talk about those fears with them. I did, and it helped me understand more and feel safer and more secure with them. That it was because they cared, not that they were frustrated or annoyed with me. That it wasn't "punishment," just them thinking maybe I needed a higher level of care than they could give right then. But if I hadn't talked about it with them, then I still would have had those fears, I'm sure. I'm still pretty jumpy around my p-doc, who I've known much less time than the other two.
As others have said, they're doing the opposite of abandoning you like your ex-T did--they're trying to help but are only able to do so much themselves. They want to see you get better and not be in so much pain.
|
I feel like if it were 6 weeks I could do it. But this would be 2 years with no guarantee I could come back anyway. If it were just a matter of that, I think I could convince myself, but I hate the idea of being a full time psych patient for that long. It's an identity thing, and I feel like it would be damaging/hurtful to me, and make it hard for me to go back and finish grad school. I finished an intensive program like this about 8 yrs ago at another hospital, and finishing it/having to re-enter the real world afterward was way more damaging than never having done it. It took forever to think of myself as a "normal person" or to shed that "sick" identity, and I swore never again. We will talk about it tomorrow though.