I'm sorry to hear that. Just stay strong. Your boundaries are everything. The fact that she can't respect those boundaries is why she failed to protect you in the first place.

My relationship with my mother is similar. The abuse that I suffered as a child is something I don't like to talk about with her because she should have known what was happening -- or she totally knew and did nothing about it. For her I think she just can't wrap her head around the fact that sexual abuse happened literally across the room from her and she just can't believe she'd let that happen. Well, unfortunately, she did.

We're close, I love her, and I know she's sorry for being a sh** mom until I was about 27-28 years old. She beats herself up about it sometimes. But I think she still lives in denial of the sexual abuse itself, like it's compartmentalized in her mind so she doesn't have to think about it when she thinks of my childhood. It used to be infuriating but now it's just disappointing. It's a relationship fracture I just can't mend. Maybe family therapy would help.