Apparently there is so much stigma attached to BPD, that I found it basically impossible to get an official diagnosis. Over the years I have made my case to multiple professionals as to why I firmly believe that I have BPD. In ever case they would agree that I essentially had all the symptoms, but ultimately ignorance and/or denial kept them from wanting to label me. Or, if I am being very optimistic, perhaps in one case or two, they hoped to spare me from the stigma by keeping the label off of me - but this was ultimately just invalidating and kept me from getting proper treatment, soooooo, yeah.

In one case the professional said it was impossible for me to have BPD because I thought I had BPD, and people with BPD are "never self-aware".

In another case, the PD possibility was brushed off because I didn't fit some stereotype as far as frequently flying off the rails and brutally abusing people. The notion that I tend to internalize most of it was apparently just too "out there" to be considered.

And so on and so forth.

I think many people with BPD will continue to struggle with confusion, when so many professionals are so confused, themselves.