Hello.

The line that separates mental illness from temperament is whether or not those traits affect the person in their ability to carry out every day tasks. Depending on what those traits are, the symptoms as they call them, and their clusters, a diagnosis on mental illness can be made. Mental illness is unfortunately a part of our evolutionary benefits. It's strange I know, but nature has its own opinion on this. They say bipolar for example is beneficial because it keeps us beasts lean and vigorous.

A significant part of being Bipolar is the cycling. Yes, left untreated hypo/mania can turn to depression and then hypo/mania again. How long these phases last is different for everyone. It depends on the person, circumstances, gender, age etc. I was depressed for 3 years and then manic for 2. Other people are on a more rapid cycle or a slower one. There has even been discussion among scientist debating the ultra rapid cycling although most dismiss it and label it cyclothymia.

There are also mixed states of the disease. Before it was re-named, Bipolar was called manic depression. This meant that a person could be manic and depressed at the same time. You can have oscillations in your mood without really changing poles.

Sure, there can be times you will feel normal. Again, it depends on the person. It's really hard to tell what normal is when you have this disorder I think. Any opinion is subjective. Including this one.

Hypo/mania feels different to different people. Personally my hypo/mania feels euphoric, I feel energized and inspired and motivated. It's not without harm of course. But truth be told, I don't mind it.

I'm sure more visits to your pdoc will clear things up for you. When I first got diagnosed I was taken by great surprise. I had heard of it before but I had absolutely no insight. It took some time and many 'aha' moments to accept that I was bipolar. It certainly explained a lot.

Keep in mind, most symptoms can be treated with the right medication. There are several options out there, combinations and dosages. You need to try a lot before getting lucky.

I'm really sorry you have to deal with this. I hope everything works out for you. Keep in touch.