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Old Nov 18, 2015, 01:36 PM
arabianhorselover arabianhorselover is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2015
Location: U.P. of Michigan
Posts: 116
Quote:
Originally Posted by rcat View Post
Well for me inappropriate things left around my house just would weigh heavily on me. I may not be a clean freak but I keep my house tidy enough should anyone drop by.

By the way, if hubby thinks car parts around the house are appropriate, what is his reaction when you visit other homes?

I think those of us with mental health issues hold more importance of a sense of home than other people do. It is our saftey net, our sense of refuge. You are unable to think of your home as such.

While yes it his responsibility to move these objects, he obviously won't do it. Are you then able to move them yourself.

Someone above recommended you set aside a place in the house where he can store these things. I realise it is still will be a bone of contention but it seems like a valid compromise. Of course you could always leave tampons around the house, haha.

But seriously.

The matter of blame, shame, and lack of support. You've said he won't go to counseling but is he willing to go to one of your own sessions with your psychiatrist or therapist?

Have a conversation with him about expectations. What are his expectations of you and let him know yours. Is there a middle ground?

He has never had a lot of expectations of me. He has stated over and over again that he has always been happy with me. It is me that has such a hard time believing that he could really be happy with me. I just always think of all the arguments we've had, and all the times I worried about our relationship. He doesn't worry at all about it. He never questions whether or not things are okay between us.

I've always been the one who has been upset over his priorities being different than mine with things like the house. I also worry a lot about his health. He doesn't worry about mine, since he knows he can't control it.

As far as what he thinks of other people's houses? He couldn't care less about anybody else's house. He does not do anything in life because somebody else does it. He figures is somebody doesn't like the way his house is, then they don't have to come over.

There really isn't anywhere else left to store anything.