Hello just know that you are not alone in this, I too had the same thing happen to me and I know that I knew things that no child at my age should have known. Same with the kinks and fetish although I'll never tell a soul what they are. However I do believe that I repressed a lot of those memories and I know I disassociate as I still do it to this day in certain situations. A group might help I'm trying to convince myself that I need help and can't do this alone and need someone to talk to. I wish you good luck in this journey and just know you are not alone at all.