I'm not sure which it is.

I'm struggling, and I have a situation I have to work through. I find myself saying I'm fine when I'm not, making jokes with friends when I feel dreadful inside. I don't want to worry them and I don't want them to see me in a state, I fear I'll lose them if I let the way I feel show.

It's like being two people, the one I let people see outside and the person who is struggling inside.

Does anyone else do this?