I'm not sure this is the right place to post this, if not forgive me and please move to the appropriate place.

how does one stop living in the past? How to just let go of it? Especially the bad stuff? and how do you stop beating yourself up over past mistakes?

I survived two abusive marriages, one physical and the other mental/emotional and physical. A family member told me because of the mental abuse I endured since they are no longer in the picture, I'm doing it to myself.

What are you thoughts?