Granite, your T (and all of here I think) sure wish we could help those negative messages you have bought into just get out of your head. You talk yourself into believing you know what everyone else around you thinks about you or will think about you even before they've had a chance to meet you. At some point you will be able to tell those negative messages to "stop it" and actually be able to hear and believe the truth about yourself that we all see which is that you are a caring, intuitive, dedicated individual. You are talented and artistic. You love your family and your husband and son love you too. Unfortunately, right now you are buying those negative messages hook, line, and sinker and are unable to hear the good and actually believe.

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time right now. Your son wants you to meet his girlfriend's family because he loves you and you are important to him. I sure wish you could see the person he loves (you) through his eyes instead of the eyes of the mother who tainted any positive view you had of yourself and twisted it into this self-hate. Your T does understand you are distressed, but she sees things about you positively and is trying to help you view yourself more realistically and positively.