You are in a dire situation. You know, you are locked in not only physically but psychologically. Is your spouse aware that he is causing you to cut? I can't do anything but tell you this. You have a voice. You have been using it. I am very proud of you that you are brave enough to stay with this thread, and trust this is a safe space. You have your reasons for wanting to remain in your situation although it is way beyond what should be happening. It is more than should be asked of anyone. If PC is helping you stay a little grounded than keep coming back. Keep your voice alive. Trust me, it is that voice that will lead you out so keep it authentic. Don't lose it.