I agree in that seeing someone else would be best, I don't have the complete fullest confidence of the Mc keeping things separate.

I'm a real mess right now, having thanksgiving dinner with family members yet my mind is so fixated on the other woman. I wish my feelings weren't so strong for her, that I didn't feel this way. When I think about it logically, I tried so hard to make it work but it was for nothing, and even just reaching out to check on her feels like pulling teeth. I miss her and I don't even know why I miss her, why I even want her, I just do.

And I realize that all this pain and suffering I'm going through is all on me, because I can't or won't let go, I fixate too much on something that isn't going to work or be. I wish I could just go away and be by myself, but I never have any time alone, always around people be it at work or home.... just so tired of being unhappy....