"Does any have similar experiences?" I could have written this myself. I've started trade schools in a manic episode thinking "now my life will be on track and stable" only to never take the state licensing tests for any of them. Luckily in my state you don't have to take a state test in medical assisting to work. However while on the job in March I had a breakdown and havn't been back to work since. My pdoc says he considers me disabled and that I can get disability. But I can't wait for the time it takes. I'm currently looking for a job but with little effort really. Your symptoms definitely sound like bipolar. Are you on meds or in therapy? I wish I had some magic answer for you but if there was one out there, none of us would be on this site. Just keep up with meds and therapy and if you're not, then you should start. You may be 31 but getting help later is better than never. While you aren't stable, I would look for a job that is the most stress free for you. I worked a very stressful job and ended up having a panic attack so bad that I blacked out, walked out, and never went back. I realize I'm not stable at the moment so the jobs I'm seeking are low stress. May not pay the best but my sanity comes first right now.

Dx: BP2, PTSD, bulimia/anorexia
Risperdal 4mg
Trileptal 300mgs
Buspar 45mgs
Ativan 1mg PRN
Vyvance 70mgs PRN