Quote:
Originally Posted by AllHeart
Platonic love, romantic love, parts love, true love, unconditional love, conditional love, adult love, child love, enduring love, goodwill love, illogical love, dangerous love, pure love, cI sual love, deep love, unhealthy love, healthy love, cultural love, therapy love, infinite love, alotta love, a little love... there are 101 ways to define the kinds and levels of love one feels for another. Just because OP isn't picking her T up from the airport at 2 am listening to him complain about his rotten trip while dropping gas doesn't mean the love isn't real.
After reading your negative nelly of a post, it seems to me that you could use a little love yourself. So I'm sending you virtual love!   Oh yes, I went there! |
Having been through transference myself and made it out the other side in tact, I must say I did this by doing a LOT of painful soul searching and looking into what I THOUGHT was romantic love for my therapist (it wasn't, it was infatuation, I "loved" an idealized version of my therapist). I thought SKYSCRAPERMEOW'S comment was the most mature comment I've read on Transference on this entire forum.
There is a reason for the transference. Everyone deserves to learn what the reason is.
Of course we can love our therapists for caring for and respecting us unconditionally, but that's their job. They're empathetic by nature, that's why they're therapists, but they're paid to be on their best behaviour during our sessions. That is, to be caring, non judgmental, unconditionally accepting of our authentic self, etc.
Anyway, I'm glad I talked to my therapist about the transference and I also did a ton of research to figure out WHY I started having romantic feelings for her after I discussed my childhood sexual abuse trauma. There was a reason. I learned a great deal about myself.
I love my therapist for showing me that I deserve to love myself unconditionally the way she cares about me. But I'm not in love with her, even though I thought I was going crazy because I couldn't stop thinking about her for a long time.
I wish you well.