Hello, i am 26 years old. I feel lonely. Since my college i used to chat with homosexual people.felt that i am one of them.and i still like them. There is no difference between a straight or gay for me.since then i used to watch gay porns.but i had never experienced the sex with man in real untill i started chating in a popular gay dating site last year. And had sex with few. I cant say that i didnt like the experience but didnt let them go further to anul me or vice versa. I stopped meeting people from dating sites after nov last year.as i thought i have to get a proper job first. Even stopped doing facebook.but i dont know why the attraction to watch gay porn remains same. But i have noticed one think watching gay porn always ends me up musterbrating .after when its done i feel what the hell i did. But this feeling does not stays very long after two or three hours again i feel to have sex with hairy gay men. I searched in internet a lot about my personality issue. But i can not understand how to get rid off this .i want to have a good career but these feelings and frustration are sucking my life out. Currently i dont have any job.dont why i get drawn towards sexual fantasies whenever i feel am depressed.Is this jobless situation the reason that attracts me towards those things? Sometimes i feel there is no hope getting out of this.