You seem to think you've found the answers to your situation. So far neither therapy nor AA seem to have worked. Yet one of AA's philosophies is "It works if you work it." Not all AA meetings or groups are alike, and attending two meetings isn't a fair shot. In my opinion, AA isn't just about not drinking. It's about creating a healthy sober life, and that is an ongoing process that isn't always immediately pleasant but is ultimately rewarding.

There are all kinds of therapeutic approaches, but therapy is unlikely to fix autism. I'm not sure what you mean by BPD. Do you mean bipolar disorder? Or do you mean Borderline Personality Disorder? I've never heard of Borderline Personality Disorder mixed with autism; I wouldn't call those two conditions natural bedfellows. If you mean Bipolar Disorder, drinking isn't going to fix that.

I have to tell you that "sophisticated social skills required to make friends, influence people, and break into cliques" aren't really sophisticated. In fact they are simple, best learned when someone is young and over time they become automatic. The best social skills are being pleasant, honest and polite, keeping your hands to yourself, sharing, taking turns, and allowing others to talk about themselves.

There are plenty of ways to "influence people". Hitler influenced people. So did Mahatma Ghandi. So what is it you really mean?

I believe "breaking into cliques" is a waste of time. The social skills I mention above will draw people to you.

Negative self-talk like "I've always been bad at relationships" is a waste of time, too. Relationships are always evolving. You don't have to understand people to have good relations with them at work, and there is no magic formula to understanding individuals; many people don't even understand themselves. Listening is a good place to start, though.

Therapy doesn't achieve anything. The individual does, with the insight and assistance of the therapist. If you want better social skills a therapist who runs group therapy might be the place to start.

If you were talking about Borderline Personality disorder then DBT is a long haul process but it does have some success.