It looks like that's it for my relationship with my mother. I just can't move on and act like nothing happened. I pleaded for compassion and my own mother kicked me when I was down and called me hateful names. If I'm so bad, she's better off without me.

I am thankful for the three wonderful children I gave birth to. If everything happens for a reason, they are my life's purpose and they will make the world a better place.

Mom 'disowned' me the first time back when I was in college. If I had stayed away and pursued the career I really liked, I wonder if I would have succeeded and if I would be a happy person today. She convinced me that I wasn't strong enough to do anything but what she wanted me to do, which was be dependent and have babies.

She may have been right. I might have tried to be on my own and gotten instantly killed by Jack The Ripper, who knows? I'm only 50 and feel like I'm done. I served my purpose and now I'm letting the clock run out on my life.