Okay, since I can't correctly spell solipsism I probably shouldn't expound on it. However, can you please tell me in simple words, what is your point?

Here is one story illustrating why I have a hard time with philosophers: I have a brother who has an advanced degree in philosophy, and he is no happier than anyone else -- and, worse, I think -- he uses philosophy to explain away his and others' pain, and he always does whatever he wants. He also does something that really bothers me. He makes up reality. For instance, he kept calling the daughter of his girlfriend his own daughter, and had her start calling him Dad. After he broke up with the girlfriend this relationship with her daughter continued. He insisted she was his daughter and he referred to himself as her father. All I wanted him to say was she was "like" a daughter but actually not his daughter and he kept saying no, she was his daughter. I said if he said one more time that this non-relative not-adopted young girl was his daughter I would not talk to him. He caused me to hang up on him.

I also kind of forgot what the existentialist say about reality. Why do they say it is meaningless? Because it is like a blank slate?

I studied Buddhism, and although many people think that Buddhism preaches non-reality, it isn't so. For the Buddhist reality is that which remains when everything "not it" is removed, such as our perception of it etc.

I started reading a lot of Stephen Hawking this past year, and to be honest, stuff about the universe and theories about it can get pretty crazy and it kind of creeped me out and even contributed to my depression and anxiety. What we read and expose ourselves to has more impact than we realize.

That's why I go back to the story of the berry.

And you?