I have never gone there with suicidal thoughts. In fact this summer my family dr. asked if I had guns around and I had a really strong reaction because it's so far off my radar.

But maybe it is the scariest thing to go with the scariest way to die? It might even be protective for you if it keeps you away from them. Still, I would be pretty freaked out of I started thinking about them that way, I'll admit. My desire to run far away keeps that danger away for me. Pills are my danger zone.