<font color="red"> I guess being depressed or down about something makes our minds more vulnerable to little triggers? I don't know any other reason for it.

But my Psychiatrist always told me that I will likely always get triggers, but as long as I don't push them aside and try to forget about them, and make them real enough to know they are there then deal with them by making them go away, just not forgetting.

Did that make sense?

I wrote about it in my post "I have a choice".

I'm ok now, nights are always the hardest, my mind always gets the best of me and i'm thinking up the worse case scenerios.

Last night I kept trying to remember stuff in my past, and I couldn't picture it. I know that it happened though, i've written it down. But can't see it.

Then I start to doubt myself wondering did it really happen? Because if it didn't wouldn't I remember it?

If I didn't come across the print out or writting I didn't on my ex and stuff that he did I wouldn't have remembered it happened. So when I came across that one piece of paper that I printed out I was shocked.

It's so frustrating..
</font>