need answers! Or at least to be told I'm not the only person that relives the same terror every day. This is just going to be a short glimpse into my daily life. 1st I've been dealing with this since I was a child, it's just getting worse and deeper. Im a really shy person, you will see me taking off on a walk by myself when involved in a big crowd. Even with my OWN FAMILY I've known my whole life! I get really anxious and nervous.* To the point where I cf ant breathe.* I've always enjoyed being in my own thoughts because honestly, I feel like an outsider, like I'm the only person alive that has the same mindset or mentality as me. Not that I think I'm superior than anybody,* just more logical and not held down by emotions. I never cry, I don't argue with people because I'm more reserved than that. Plus, I just never feel the need. Now this is where it gets interesting, for about 5 years now, I've gotten to were anytime I'm at home by myself, I get this feeling of impending doom, pure terror,* almost like I'm constantly running from Freddy in the horror movies. Its crippling, I've always been an independent person,* so it's hard to ask my family for help because I know they wouldn't understand.* I'm always seeing almost like premonitions and I can't control them. I've seen my son get shot in the head by an intruder.* Or my son having to watch me get hurt and I can't help him. I know it's supposed to be mind over matter but that one aspect I cannot seem to stop. I won't take a shower unless someone is home to sit with my son because I always have that gut feeling that something is going to happen. And if I'm in the shower when it does, then I wouldn't make it to my son before someone else does and I can't take that chance. I pace the floors, check the locks and windows religiously, and stay up all night with my mind racing. Its very exhausting just trying to act normal so I don't have o explain what's going on, because after all, this is not normal and I don't expect many people to understand.