Actually i started drinking because i wanted to please that T. he used to say i was too guarded with him, so i thought drinking would have made me more like he wanted me to be. i did it and he fired me anyway, so that was not the cause of being fired. i re-started drinking (i had not for months) with the idea of it HELPING ME AND HIM AND OUR RELATIONSHIP, but it didnt work. i still havent understood why he fired me. said he would send me an explanation letter but i havent received it yet. probably i never will. but from that day on, i've started drinking every day and i cant stop. i dont know how else to face the day... i dont want to be alive and live each and every day. you know? im so sick of everything....