I've tried to hide from my problems and just lie the depression away. I've never forged a true partnership with any of the many who have tried to treat me.

That period is over now that I am in such a desperate place. I'm so low right now, and am convinced that I'll never work again.

I want the pain to stop but my options are limited because there are those who somehow love me. I have to stay alive no matter what. I have to find a way to get through this and realize that this is a temporary problem.

It's hard, though, as I've lost medical coverage and am out of medicine. As it flushes out of my system, this problem will reach an entirely new level. I am so scared!