Im dreading it. 100 people I dont know at all. My anxiety is high, Im starting to feel sick.

Its in a city about 4 hours away. My fiances best friend is turning 50. We have to go. I cant get out of it.

Its friends from fiancés past, people he hasnt seen in years. Im so afraid I'll embarrass him.

Question what he's doing with someone like me.

I was putting up Christmas lights on the house today and almost wished I had fallen off the ladder so I didn't have to go. Thats how much anxiety this is causing.

Why can't I just be normalish?!