Its very hard for me to explain, but I will try to.
So, I am obsesing about the fact that people that are being transported to a mental hospital are being transported restrained (either tied by their hands and feet to the gurney, or in handcuffs). Its a common procedure that happens pretty much everywhere, if you go to a psychiatrist or ER (or A&E) and they think you need to be hospitalised, you will be taken there restrained even if you are not agresive and you are willing to go voluntarily.

Depending on the country or state, you may be trnsported without restraints if you are not considered a danger to yourself (although generaly they will tie you up just to make sure), however one thing is sure: if you go to a psychiatrist with suicidal thoughts, when you are being transported you will definitely be tied up. Same happens if you call emergency service from home if you feel suicidal, or you go to A&E yourself. It doesnt matter that you did not try anything and that you were willing to go voluntarily, they will tie you up just to make sure that you are not agresive.

I personally think its horrible that they do that and that if you have a psychological problem and you want help then this is how you are treated. I dont feel suicidal now, but I did in the past from being depresed, and to think that this is how I would be treated if I go to get help seems horible to me (fortunately I never told anyone and it passed). Ive seen doctors, nurses, cops, even patients defending it, its clear that I am too sensitive and unable to see how restraining is done for safety, and its my fault for not understanding.And I am ok with that.

I just cant stop obsesing about it because it bothers me so much, and if you type on google feeling suicidal or geting help for suicide, everything that you read is so encouraging for you to go get help, and not to be afraid, and there are articles that are taking you thru what will happen and so on. But one thing is missing: no one tells you that you are most likely going to be tied up. There are articles that tel you to call emergency services and they will take you to get help (without mentioning that you will be either handcuffed or tied to the gurney as its common procedure), there are even articles describing every single thing that will happen from when you go to an emergency room, to what will happen when you get to the hospital (except that the transportation method is always not mentioned).

I guess they arent mentioning the fact that you will be tied up so they wont scare people, but I cant understand how they can be so encouraging knowing how horrible it will be for you when you get put in handcuffs like a criminal for wanting help.
As I said, I understand that its my fault for not being able to understand them, when people that studied psychology for decades defend it, then clearly I am an idiot.
But the problem is that I cant stop obsesing about it, its been like that for 5 years and I dont know what to do anymore. Sometimes it stops for a few weeks, just to start again.
What can I do to stop thinking about it? I think its horrible, but there is nothing I can do, I just want to stop obsesing and move on with my life. Its been like that before i as born and they know better, so i should just stop obsesing and accept I am wrong. But my OCD wont let me...

I dont want to go to a psychiatrist, knowing that if I were to go with suicidal thoughts being depresed, there would be a very real chance I would end up tied up. I know nothing will happen if I go with OCD, but I dont want any help from those people because I think they are horrible.
So what can I do to stop these thoughts and this anxiety? Can anybody help?