I have been to coda too, and I found something similar to you seeker so I didnt stick it. But, what I found in AA was almost an opposite message, they emphasise service and caring and giving to others.
I think sometines people when trying to change behaviour swing to extremes. I find it almost unbearable to sit through some of that stuff, specially when it is put over as recovery. Take what you like and what you need is, as wantstofly puts it, the general principle. I have spent 12 years in the fellowships, and am now really questioning my paticipation. I may have come to a completely different turning in life now, maybe time to experiment.
My current desire is to furhter explore the whole self disorders understanding and healing, I'd like to do this with others using the fellowship principles, with this as specific focus, but if thats not going to be possible then..........I dont know, maybe time for a change. But I think what I have gained from the fellowships has been the most healing principle I have come accross, at least when its done right.

riverx