First off...at this point it's NOT love you are feeling for him. You can't really love someone you really don't know. Being attracted GROWS into love when the things we see in the person as we get to know them better are compatible with our own lives, likes, & goals. You are just getting to know this person even though you are engaged.....& you aren't liking what you see.

Got news for you....these things don't get better with time. They just get more annoying the longer we end up being forced to tolerate the bad things until it ends up feeling trapped & having to get divorced which is a lot harder then ending it at this point.

Yes....I went through this myself...way back in 1975. Right before the marriage I realized the red flags but was talked out of them & then talked myself out of stopping the wedding. hUGE mistake..... 33 years later & tolerating (not well) the issues for all those years, I was finally able to leave the marriage after actually being trapped in it the last 13 years of that time. I didn't realize how much it fed into my depression from loosing my career because I hid from my marriage in my career. Depression, suicide attempts....all because I didn't listen to that voice inside before the wedding that flagged the serious issues that he never out grew. I found out why several years after leaving what caused his issues....it gave me understanding so I could stop hating him for what he had done to my life.

I have been free for 8 years now & getting to know myself has been a most important challenge but the best thing that ever happened in my life. Living alone for the first time in my life at the age of 53 has been wonderful a wonderful experience I wouldn't trade for anything....free at last. Don't make the same mistake I did, being talked into believing he would change when he had to when he grew up. Some people (women & men alike) never grow up because they either don't want to or there is some underlying reason why they can't .