Not to scare you, but you should be worried if he says he's scared of the thoughts. I've been suicidal in ways that both comforted me and scared me. I have PTSD, bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder, so I've been through the wringer with my moods. I had a very long depression that ended in a suicide attempt that I was at peace with. I have also had moods where I felt very agitated and suicidal. After I calmed down I was scared because I knew I wasn't in my right state of mind and that I could have committed suicide impulsively. It's the impulse that is scary. If your husband is experiencing impulses it's a dangerous state to be in and hospitalization and medication would be the way to go. He may benefit from a mood stabilizer and that might also reduce his nasty outbursts towards you. (Not a doctor, just an experienced patient)