Yeah. Loneliness.

Since my grandmother died in 2004, everything has paled in comparison to those wonderful days where the Internet was not important and all the stress, heartache and general crap was yet to happen in my life, and probably in all of your lives too.

While I do have an older best friend, I sadly do not have any "real life" friends in my age range due to feeling anxious and that is because I never make the effort to find any either, and during the daring attempts I made, I was left hurt, so I realized that being alone is more healthy, but not really.

I must say - I think the last 3 years of my life have been among the worst ever, from finding my ex and getting screwed by her, albeit in a non-sexual way, going to jail, losing my flat and all the bullying online.

I still have a cry over my former key worker Sara from time to time. And I truly love and miss my Latino mentor. My world feels empty without a lot of people - actually. Her especially.

I am considering not using message boards after the new year begins. There is nothing interesting to talk about. Forums were a bit on the pleasurable side 12 years ago. Now they are really very boring.

My sister nearly lost her other son recently. Since that is her business, I cannot really delve into the ins and outs of what has went on, but 2015 is going to be remembered as the wake-up call I so rightfully needed.

I am sure you all get treated like dirt by the neurotypical scum, my comrades.