I'm feeling on edge. Can't relax, waiting to go to work isn't helping at all. I'm scared that I can't keep up the facade that people expect. I just hate it all. What's the point of what anyone is even doing? I feel like everyone around me is just stupid & mindless. I can't stop moving, minds racing but I don't even know what I'm thinking to be honest. It just sounds busy. I'm drinking, it's taking the edge off abit. I just don't want to be present. Ever. My mind wanders & I get irritable when someone starts talking to me because I find it hard to focus. I hate being either agitated or tired or a combination of them both.