Hello cccosmonaut: Welcome to PsychCentral! PC is a great place to find support as well as to obtain mental health related information. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more you'll gain from the time you spend here.

From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though you are really over extended & suffering under the weight of all that you are trying to do. This project you are trying to work on is the proverbial straw that is breaking the camel's back. I remember many years ago now, when I was in grad school, a number of our professors made a point of encouraging us not to get too focused in on getting perfect grades... doing everything just right. A person can simply drive themselves too far.

So, from my perspective, perhaps what is happening with you is that this struggle you are having with this project is a signal welling up from your subconscious mind telling you that you're just running out of gas... & you're going to have to slow down a bit... make some difficult choices about what is really important at the present time.

The thing you don't want to see happen is for these feelings you're having to become ingrained within your subconscious as well as your conscious minds to the point where you begin reacting the same way even after the pressure is off. If you find that you simply aren't able to make the necessary decisions alone, then this is where your therapist comes in. Seek this person's help in doing so. I wish you well...